Monday Motivation **February 26, 2018

(Image from google)

Week 3 marathon training…………well as the picture above says the only bad workout is the one that didn’t happen, so all my workouts this week were bad, because they didn’t happen lol. However I did help move a tub back and forth about 6 times while Brandon measured and measured and measured and cut the floor around the tub before we finally got it mortared in, so that kind of counts as a workout right?

And I scrubbed the top kitchen cabinets and scrapped out the 3 layers of decorative wall paper/contact paper out of one of the bottom cupboards then painted the inside of it as well as clean out the fridge (we got it free from his parents because they replaced theirs).

That all counts as at least 1 arm workout right? Cause my arms were sore at the end of the day that is for sure!

And we managed a little bit of healthy eating! I had already packed my magic bullet and brought it to the new house and saw that Brandon had brought bananas so I ran to target right around the corner and grabbed some frozen strawberries and made us smoothies for breakfast. Then we had chips, salsa and guacamole for lunch/snack. And for dinner I made us homemade pizzas on naan bread. I would say that is pretty good. Finally having the fridge in the house is going to make such a big difference in our eating now!!!

Though we still don’t have the water turned on since he is working in the bathroom so I can’t really wash dishes which means it is still pretty quick, easy, semi-processed meals but I can control it much better than in a restaurant and I know it is a fraction of the calories, no matter what it is lol!

 

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Monday Motivation **February 12, 2017

(Image from google)

Didn’t make it to the gym last week, my 1 night I had time I chose to sleep and get some laundry done.

I did do a lot of cleaning and lifting heavy things with the remodel so I got a smidge of a workout done hahaha.

Starting to get a handle on the new schedule so hopefully the gym will fit into it this week.

Monday Motivation **February 5, 2017

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Last week I made it to the gym once, quite an improvement hahaha. I ran 1.5 miles on Wednesday. I could have forced myself to go longer but really the goal was just to get to the gym and workout. I left it feeling incredibly depressed, Wednesday was 4 weeks since my brother died so it hit me kind of hard.

Realistically I do not anticipate making it to the gym this week, a lot has come up with the house which I will tell you about soon but my goal is to get 2 runs this week, I just need to get back into the habit of fitting in some fitness time.

And we do have a 5k coming up this weekend so I know I will at least get 1 good run in.

Monday Motivation **January 29, 2017

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Monday- after work I came home and studied. I was still feeling really down so I went back and forth between studying and watching Castle episodes on Amazon.

Tuesday- After work I went straight to school to get in some last minute studying before my midterm. I tried for healthy food choices and I did ok. I packed an apple, peanut butter, cheese and crackers…..and of course an energy drink.

Wednesday- After work I had a meet and greet kind of thing with a therapist, I want to make sure I get on track and stay on track through all this stress and depression. After that I went home, cuddled in bed with my puppy and went to sleep early.

Thursday- Had lab after work. I went straight to school after work to do all my pre-lab work……had healthy snacks again, though an energy drink as well. Then the bf brought a big pizza after lab hahahaha

Friday- I had looked up and planned a trail run/hike for today but we ended up sleeping in and not really getting up and going until after noon and the hike was an hour away. I had planned to make a roast chicken for dinner so I didn’t want to bet back at 8pm and not eat until 10pm. So we ended up laying around the house for most of the day. We got out and went grocery shopping and looked for some nick-nacks for the house and ended up not getting back until 6:30 anyways so we ended up eating around 9 lol. But it turned out soooo good!!! It probably clogged our arties with the amount of butter I used but it was gooooood!!!

Saturday- We slept in again then headed out to Brandon’s grandparents house. I just love it out there!!! We relaxed and talked with them, fed the cows, had some great dinner. Then headed home around 8pm.

Sunday- I brought everything to go to the gym after work then couldn’t find my key card to actually get in the gym. Really need to find that. Hopefully that means I’ll be able to hit the gym Monday after work!

Monday Motivation ** January 22, 2017

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Monday- was a no go day in all ways. Sunday night it hit me that I had to go back to “normal” life and that was so hard. Brandon held me while I cried and I didn’t fall asleep until 1:30-2am which made getting up at 5:40am pretty rough. Coffee was needed. I felt sick to my stomach most of the day and was holding back tears. After work I went home and just crawled into bed. I watched 5 hours of Smallville, took some melatonin and cuddled with my puppy.

Tuesday- I felt a little better and started the day off right with some carrot, celery, apple juice. Had canned soup for lunch (not the best choice but better than a lot of other choices) I had a Slimfast and a protein bar for snacks since I wouldn’t be home until almost 10pm with school but since I didn’t do anything on Monday I didn’t prep a good dinner to take to school so I ate out (Panda Express; mushroom chicken, kung pao chicken and beef and broccoli, I avoided the carbs). I tried to use moderation and the best choices possible while not breaking the bank or taking too much time away from studying.

Wednesday – I should have gone to the gym but I had no energy

Thursday – I had lab, I got McDonalds in between work and school and remembered that depression makes everything so much more difficult. We were looking at tissue samples in lab (I’ll cover that more on Friday’s post) and I am not great with the microscope and knowing what I am or should be looking at, add in that depression increases stress and I almost started crying in my lab.

Friday- I stayed in bed or on the couch most of the day. I managed to get up and go for a 1.5 mile walk with Artemis and Brandon but I know if Brandon hadn’t been there and going stir-crazy even that would not have happened. I was so tired and lethargic and just depressed all day.

Saturday was mostly a lot better. We got up and did a little day trip I had planned for us during the week. We drove out to Cape lookout and did a just under 5 mile trail run/hike. We were probably only able to run a little less than half of this because the other half was crazy muddy, had large boulders to climb over and giant tree roots to climb over. I may have fallen on my butt in the mud lol. But it was still fun and good to get out and do something. After the run/hike we hit the Tillamook cheese factory for lunch and bought a few goodies.

We got home, cleaned up and watched the movie “Julie and Julia”. I can’t wait to have a whole kitchen all to myself!!!!! I am going to cook so much!!!

Saturday night was another story, I don’t know what it is, maybe because on the weekend I don’t have to deal with it, I can turn the TV and numb the world out as long as I need but knowing I have to go back to work and face the world just seems to be breaking me each week. Once again I got into bed and all my thoughts and stresses of the coming week came forward and I cried for almost 2 hours while Brandon held me. So of course I was a Zombie on Sunday and yet I need to study for my Midterm, yes I already have a MIDTERM!!!!! How am I supposed to learn everything I need to know when I don’t want to think and when I do think I break down.

Now I remember how the thought of going to class after my dad died was so daunting. Not surprised it took me 4 years to do 2 years of classes back then.

I do not want that to happened again and certainly cannot afford to need to repeat classes so I have started looking for a therapist and/or bereavement group. I can’t fall down the black hole I did after my dad died. I am just hoping I can find some energy and motivation to get through this midterm and not bomb it.

At the end of this week I will have drank more energy drinks in 1 week than I normally drink it a year and that is just to function on a basic level.

Monday Motivation **January 15, 2017

(Image from google)

I managed 3 runs this week for a grand total of 7 miles. Given the circumstances I am thrilled with a that.

I managed 2 miles last Monday morning while we were in Reno. This was a really good run for me, not because it felt amazing (running at 5000ft when you are used to sea level isn’t super fun hahaha) but because I was sad and depressed and we had been eating crap for days which just added to it so this was absolutely needed for my mental well being as well as physical.

Brandon came over for the weekend once I was back and got me out for 2 runs. Both were a major combination of walking and running.

We actually saw some sun in Portland this weekend so we managed both these runs outside!

Other than this my life has been a lot of small things here and there just taking it day by day.

I am back at work this morning and I am just numb. It was so hard to go to sleep last night my brain wouldn’t shut off, I got maybe 4 hours of sleep and balled my eyes out before being able to go to sleep last night. Just thinking about the terrible turn life took the last time I was sitting at this desk is really hard.

That is my life right now. I hope yours is going a little better.

Monday Motivation **December 18, 2017

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Happy Monday!

Here is how last weeks workouts went for me.

Monday: 

Tuesday: drove out to the BF’s house, we had planned on running when I got there but it was super cold, pitch black and I was bloated so that didn’t happen hahaha. Just means I gotta kick but on Wednesday.

Wednesday: 

Thursday: Ran 1.3 miles, my stomach was not my friend and I was tired from Wednesday but I got there a did something so I am happy with that.

Friday-no workout. I got 5000 steps but otherwise sat on my butt all day

Saturday- even worse hahahahahaha, I layed on the couch most of the day and watched TV while Brandon looked up other loan options and housing options and so on and so forth.

Sunday-The plan was to go to the gym after work and knock out 3 miles but around 2 ‘o’ clock painful bloating started. I tend not to get relieved for lunch until almost 1 sometimes a little later. I am going to have to start eating my lunch either in 2 smaller amounts (probably better for me anyways) or eat lunch on my break earlier in the day.

Total mileage for the week: 5.3 miles (not great but its something)