School+update

School is done and I couldn’t be happier. I ended with a C meaning I will have to retake the class to get at least a B which is what I need for nursing but I am ok with this. The last month of class I was sick and stressed and moving and so I let myself off the hook. I also have to remember that it hasn’t even been 3 full months since my brother died, my emotions are all out of wack. I am taking next quarter off school and feel great about it. This last quarter just exhausted me, I should have taken it off after my brother died but I didn’t and I know for sure that my health and well-being suffered for it. So I am putting me first and taking next quarter off. It will give me time to settle into the new house, which is currently still a mess, and settle into a new routine living with someone and commuting and all that. So that is that for school and here are more house and life updates:

The bathroom is finally starting to really come together! we have about 1/3 of the walls tiled now and even managed a bath yesterday which was AMAZING!! We couldn’t adjust the temp of the water because the spigot isn’t on yet so it was luke warm water coming out which we combined with boiled water hahahahaha, but it worked and being clean felt amazing!

We went for a short walk around the block on Friday morning, Artemis was very happy to get out of the house, though she is starting to settle in and spend longer amounts of time exploring the back yard.

Seed starts!!!! I am so excited about these!!! And I will probably have about 3-4 more trays before I am done! If even half of these survive we will have a GREAT garden and a good amount of food. I can’t wait to see how it all grows.

That is just a quickie update since I didn’t post on Friday. More to come tomorrow on Monday Motivation!!!!

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Since I’ve been gone

So last week and the beginning of this week were rough for me. I have battled depression and mood highs and lows since i was 16. I have seen therapists and physiologists. I have been a bindge drinker, bindge eater and cutter. Thankfully after my dad died my mom and brother found me a great Dr who didn’t just prescribe meds but took the time to work through my, at the time current, issues and teach me tools to pull myself out of that dark place when i went there. He knew it would be a lifelong battle for me and probably saved my life. Before him i was headed down a bad path. I have never been and will never be ashamed of past or of the fact that i deal with this. Feeling the extreme lows also means I get to feel the extreme highs, I get to love deeper and more often then most people becuase I wear my emotions on my sleeve. Yes it can be difficult and painful but it can also be joyous and wonderous. I will have an adventure filled life, the battle is simply to do it on a healthy way which is why i am so passionate about eating healthy and being active. 

That being said lets catch up. 

My sweet coworker got me flowers and candy to cheer me up om the anniversary of my dads death


Friday Artemis and I got up with the sun and went for the shortest run ever lol

I wasnt super happy about getting out of bed lol

Friday night we went to the vet, Artemis had to get her shots. Shes up to date and protected now!

Then we relaxed to make sure she didnt have any reactions

Saturday we pretty much just relaxed and she slept a lot. Recovering from the shots

I caught this wonderful picture when she yawned

Saturday night/Sunday morning i hit rock bottom and took a nap after only being awake an hour then layed in bed and cried. I made myself get out of bed and go for a walk with Artemis 

We went 3 miles. And i reached out to family and friends to keep an eye on me for self-destructive behavior. 

After the walk i went grocery shopping and did meal prep

I love to cook so this helped my mood a lot. 

Each day i am climbing out of the dark. Today was a good day and i am almost back to normal! Thankfully these lows only happen 2-3 times a year depending on the year sometimes even less. 

Went for a walk with the roommate tonight 

And my cowoker finished a really interesting book and gave it to me to ready. Only on the 2md chapter and im hooked! Can’t wait to keeo reading

Thats it for me!!

If anyone ever suffers from suicidal thoughts or self-destructive behavior or severe depression please reach out to someone. You are not alone, i know it feels like you are, but you are not. 

TGIT

So happy tomorrow is Friday. I am so excited for my running date!!!!!

So i spent my lunch at Starbucks enjoying being outside

Like my free sunglasses from a race?

Pretty awesome

I came home and unpacked 5 boxes

Then the pup and I chilled

Then the roommate, the dogs and I went for a walk

Soooo close but sooooo far from my step goal

Next up was some Dallas Cowboys Cheerleaders training camp!

Now check out this delicious homemade dog food!!!

She LOVED it!!!