Since I’ve been gone

So last week and the beginning of this week were rough for me. I have battled depression and mood highs and lows since i was 16. I have seen therapists and physiologists. I have been a bindge drinker, bindge eater and cutter. Thankfully after my dad died my mom and brother found me a great Dr who didn’t just prescribe meds but took the time to work through my, at the time current, issues and teach me tools to pull myself out of that dark place when i went there. He knew it would be a lifelong battle for me and probably saved my life. Before him i was headed down a bad path. I have never been and will never be ashamed of past or of the fact that i deal with this. Feeling the extreme lows also means I get to feel the extreme highs, I get to love deeper and more often then most people becuase I wear my emotions on my sleeve. Yes it can be difficult and painful but it can also be joyous and wonderous. I will have an adventure filled life, the battle is simply to do it on a healthy way which is why i am so passionate about eating healthy and being active. 

That being said lets catch up. 

My sweet coworker got me flowers and candy to cheer me up om the anniversary of my dads death

Friday Artemis and I got up with the sun and went for the shortest run ever lol

I wasnt super happy about getting out of bed lol

Friday night we went to the vet, Artemis had to get her shots. Shes up to date and protected now!

Then we relaxed to make sure she didnt have any reactions

Saturday we pretty much just relaxed and she slept a lot. Recovering from the shots

I caught this wonderful picture when she yawned

Saturday night/Sunday morning i hit rock bottom and took a nap after only being awake an hour then layed in bed and cried. I made myself get out of bed and go for a walk with Artemis 

We went 3 miles. And i reached out to family and friends to keep an eye on me for self-destructive behavior. 

After the walk i went grocery shopping and did meal prep

I love to cook so this helped my mood a lot. 

Each day i am climbing out of the dark. Today was a good day and i am almost back to normal! Thankfully these lows only happen 2-3 times a year depending on the year sometimes even less. 

Went for a walk with the roommate tonight 

And my cowoker finished a really interesting book and gave it to me to ready. Only on the 2md chapter and im hooked! Can’t wait to keeo reading

Thats it for me!!

If anyone ever suffers from suicidal thoughts or self-destructive behavior or severe depression please reach out to someone. You are not alone, i know it feels like you are, but you are not. 

Book on tape review

This was a cute book but I don’t feel the need to read anymore in the series. The book served it’s purpose and I enjoyed listening to it but it wasn’t my favorite. But it is a fun simple read for working out or on the beach. 

Autumn Equinox


Happy Autumn Equinox!!!!! Today we have the same amount of light and dark, perfect balance.


Today is also the 2nd harvest festival of the year!



We are entering my FAVORITE time of year!! I love coats and sweaters and scarves and boots and gloves. and oooooh the food!!!!!!! Gotta keep that excercise up because i plan on indulging!!!!


Does this not look amazing!!! Click on the link for the recipe.


I want these, pumpkin cookes. Follow the link for the recipe


I dont even like pecans but i want these!!! Follow the link for the reciepe.

3a418cded1b031ae32c87d418423fd18 from pintrest

I am so excited for cooler days!!!!!




I brought my rumning clothes to run at lunch again. By the time i hit a 1/2 mile i knew this was going to suck. My left calf was soooo tight. It hurt!!!

I stopped a few times to stretch it out

At least there are some pretty places around work to run

I pushed and made it to 3 miles. I walked at least 1/3 of the 3 miles

After work i took miss Artemis for a walk

She hasn’t been getting out as much since i have been running at lunch and busy after work. 

After the walk i met my friend at the gym for an easy 30 min strength session. We were both sore so we took it semi-easy.

When i got home from the gym my roommate and i cleaned up the living room. I’ll post picks soon. 

I found my tablet and got it charged so the studying os back on!!

Another accomplished day. And now it is sleep time. Sweet Dreams All!!!